Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Communication

Men and Women Communicate Differently
I thought the following video was pretty funny. It’s a comedian telling about the differences in in how men and women communicate. You will enjoy it. Remember laughter is good for you.

This is the last day of September.
Remember to reset you calendar tomorrow.

Back to the Gym
We’re heading back to the gym today. The doctor said I could return to working out but not at full speed. I’ll be leaving off the weights, and just doing the bicycle at about half speed.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
You don’t need anyone’s help to keep a secret.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Grace isn't a little prayer you chant before
receiving a meal.  It's a way to live. 
~Attributed to Jacqueline Winspear

~~~
Joke of the Day

A man has been in business for many, many years and the business is going down the drain. He is seriously contemplating suicide and he doesn't know what to do. He goes to a priest to seek his advice.

The priest says, "Take a beach chair and a Bible and put them in your car and drive down to the edge of the ocean. Go to the water's edge. Take the beach chair out of the car, sit on it and take the Bible out and open it up. The wind will rifle the pages for awhile and eventually the Bible will stay open at a particular page. Read the Bible and it will tell you what to do.

The man does as he is told. He looks down at the Bible and sees what he has to do. Three months later the man and his family come back to see the priest. The man is wearing a $1,000 Italian suit, the wife is all decked out with a full-length mink coat, and the child is dressed in beautiful silk.

The man hands the priest an envelope filled with money for the church to thank him. The priest is delighted and asks the man what advice in the Bible brought this good fortune to him. The man replies: "Chapter 11."



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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Rough Waters

Force of Nature
Have you ever been tossed around by the force of nature in a rough sea. I have experience some rough waters a few times in my life.  Once I went deep sea fishing from Murrells Inlet in SC and we had very rough water. We were in a converted PT boat and I’ll never forget the rough waters. Another time I was on lake Erie with a guide in a small boat. The waves were so large that when you were down between them you could see nothing but water. It was so bad the guide had to return to the marina. No fishing that day. Then we have our local lakes, and at the top of the list for rough water is Watauga Lake. It must be the way the wind blows down between those mountains that can make the lake rage.

I thought I had been in rough water until I saw the following video clip. Watch it and can you just imagine what it must be like to be on a ship in the midst of such rough waters.

 

Seas of Life
Sometimes we are on the rough seas of life. It is important we ride out the storm. We are thankful for days we can be in the harbor to recuperate. Our days of convention were like being in the harbor for repairs and to replenish the vessel for the next voyage.

Interesting
Once a captain of a ship was in a very rough storm. Everyone was tossed around and feared for their life. After the storm, a passenger asked the captain if he was praying during the storm. He replied that he was trying to steer the vessel to safety during the storm. He said he had prayed before the storm. Remember to pray before the storms come.

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Lack of forgiveness can build a wall that can be like a prison; but forgiveness opens the doors to a new life.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the
heel that has crushed it. 
~Mark Twain

~~~
Joke of the Day

A man was out hunting dove, and, finished for the day, he got in his truck to leave. Just then the game warden pulls up and says, "I need to see your license and your kills for the day."

The man pulls out his license, then walks to the back of the truck, pulls aside the tarp covering the bed. The game warden was astounded to see the truck was piled to the top with dove.

"Son," says the warden, "you know you are well past your limit here, don't you?"

The young man replies, "Yes sir, but I couldn't see just letting them lie there and rot.

"The game warden replies, "Well, why'd you shoot so many?"

"Well, sir, I didn't shoot 'em, I uglied them to death."

"What do you mean?" replies the warden.

"I can't tell you, I'll just have to show you," replies the young man. "Okay," says the warden, whereupon they both walked out into the field.

A flight of dove suddenly burst into the air, and the young man began screaming at the top of his lungs, making faces and jumping into the air.

The birds fell from the sky like rain. The warden, stunned, says, "Well I'll be--I-I've never seen anything like that in my life! Where'd you learn that trick, boy?"

"From my wife, sir."

"Well, why ain't she out here with you?"

"Oh, I can't bring her, sir, she tears 'em up too bad!!!!"



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Monday, September 28, 2009

Back Home

Knoxville Convention
We returned home last night from a wonderful four days of our church convention. I’m be working on my “gems” in the next few days and will try to have them ready to share with you by this weekend.

A Big Trout
48lbTROUT Here’s a picture of the biggest rainbow trout I have ever seen. The fish weighed 48 pounds and was caught in Lake Diefenbaker which is in Southern Saskatchewan, Canada. That sure makes those 6-7 pound trout we’ve been catching locally look kind of puny.

There is some question whether the trout is truly a new world record. Read more about it.

 

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I’ve always wondered why people playing bagpipes always walk when they play. I think I’ve figured it out. They are trying to get away from the noise.

~~~
Quote of the Day
“Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.”
~ William James

~~~
Joke of the Day

My friend is so cheap. He didn't want to waste cheese, so he set a mouse trap using a picture of some cheese. Any luck? Yeah. He caught a picture of a mouse.

And….

Bill and Steve are sitting in a bar watching the 11 o'clock news. The lead-off story concerns a woman on an eleventh floor ledge announcing her intention to jump. 'I'll bet you $25 she doesn't jump.' says Bill. Steve takes the bet, but sure enough, the woman jumps. 'I can't take your money, Bill.' says Steve, 'I saw the story on the 6 o'clock news, so I knew she'd jump.' 'No, take it -- I saw the 6 o'clock news too, but I was sure that this time she wouldn't do it.'

And…

A child psychologist from NYU is studying the limits of optimism in children, by placing them in a small room filled with horse manure, and observing their behavior. When one of the most optimistic children is placed in the room, she happily runs around digging through the manure. The psychologist is overcome with curiosity, enters the room and asks the child 'What are you doing?' 'Well,' says the small girl, 'I figure with all this manure, there's got to be a pony in here somewhere.



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Saturday, September 26, 2009

Our Tongue Can Be Like Wild Fire

Wild Fire
Take a look at this time lapse photography taken on August 31, 2009 of one of the California wild fires.

The wildfires are often caused by carelessness.

Let us not be careless with our tongue. It can be as destructive as a wildfire. Remember what James wrote,

“Even so the tongue is a little member,
and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth!

“ And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity; so is the tongue among our member, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and is set on fire of hell.

“For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind:

“But the tongue can no man tame;
it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.”

~James 3, verses 5-8

 

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
The task ahead of us is never as great as
the power behind us when we are in God’s will.


~~~
Quote of the Day
Some see a hopeless end,
while others see an endless hope.
~Author Unknown

~~~
Joke of the Day

No one ever believed Jim when he told them the size of the fish he caught, so he purchased a scale, and hired a notary public to accompany him fishing, and document the weights of the fish.

One day, a woman had an emergency delivery of a baby by the dock while Jim and his notary were preparing their boat. The doctor on the scene noticed the scales, borrowed them, and announced: “Mrs. Johnson, you're the mother of a 37 pound boy!”



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Friday, September 25, 2009

All is Well

Something Cute
This little video makes you say, “Aah”. It shows a meeting between a baby and a dog.

Convention
Today will be our second day of convention. Here’s a few thoughts from yesterday…

  1. A warning: We could have fellowship with God’s people, but fail to have fellowship with God and miss our reward.
  2. God is ruling the earth today. Don’t lose sight that God is in full control of what happens on earth.
  3. God created the universe out of nothing. If we
    become nothing, He can make something useful out of us.
 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Don’t worry because your friends are not all perfect. Because if they were, then you would not fit in.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.
~Thomas Jefferson

~~~
Joke of the Day

Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"

God says: "So you would love her."

"But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"

God says: "So she would love you."



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Thursday, September 24, 2009

Knoxville Convention

Thursday
This is our first day of our church convention. I hope to have a little thought or two to share with you tomorrow. When I think of coming to convention I think of those words of David in the 139th Psalm,

“Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

God’s Creation
The following video about the Hubble Telescope shows things and a perspective mankind has never seen before. We are awed by God’s creation.

 

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Someone said that if you ever get at your wit’s end, God will be there to help you.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Charity sees the need, not the cause.
~German Proverb

~~~
Joke of the Day

A California policeman pulled a car over and told the driver that because he had been wearing his seatbelt, he had just won $5,000 dollars in the statewide safety competition. "What are you going to do with the money?" asked the policeman.

"Well, I guess I'm going to get a driver's license," he answered.

"Oh, don't listen to him," yelled a woman in the passenger seat. "He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."

This woke up the guy in the back-seat, who took one look at the cop and moaned, "I knew we wouldn't get far in a stolen car."

At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice said, in Spanish, "Are we over the border yet?"



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Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Safety Tips

For Both Men and Women
safeday I received these safety tips from a friend not long ago. They sound like appropriate things to do. If you disagree please comment.

This is way too long for my post today, but it could save your life or a love one's life. Review these things to do in an emergency situation.

  1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do : The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you have the need and you are close enough to use it, do!
  2. Learned this from a tourist guide. If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you.... Chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
  3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy.. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
  4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON'T DO THIS!) The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR , LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, Repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat they will get the worst of it . As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your body in a remote location.
  5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage: A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor , and in the back seat B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars. C.) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side... If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
  6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!
  7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; and even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, Preferably in a zigzag pattern!
  8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP, It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
  9. Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird.. The police told her 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door..' The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it, but have had several calls by women saying that they hear baby's cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.
  10. Water scam! If you wake up in the middle of the night to hear all your taps outside running or what you think is a burst pipe, DO NOT GO OUT TO INVESTIGATE! These people turn on all your outside taps full ball so that you will go out to investigate and then attack. Stay alert, keep safe, and look out for your neighbors!

Knoxville Convention
Today we leave home to go to our Knoxville Church Convention. We looking forward to our 4 days of  meetings and food for the soul.

I am not sure if I will have any posts over the next few days. It depends on the availability of a wireless internet connection and if I have enough time to make a quick post.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Every day is Safety Day!
Be careful in everything you do. Practice safety and be watchful of events around you at all time.
And always drive defensively.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit.  Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset. 
~St Francis de Sales

~~~
Joke of the Day

An Indian man, a Jewish man, and a lawyer are weary from traveling and ask a farmer if they can stay for the night. The farmer says fine, but one of them will have to stay in the barn.

The Indian man say, "Okay, no problem, I will". So they all settle in to sleep, but five minutes later there is a knock at the door. It is the Indian man, and he explains that he can't sleep in the barn because there is a cow there and it is against his religion.

The Jewish man says, "Okay, no problem, I'll sleep in the barn." Again, they all settle in, but five minutes later there is another knock at the door. It is the Jewish man, and he apologizes that because there is a pig in the barn, he cannot sleep there.

So the lawyer says, "Don't worry, I'll go sleep in the barn." Again, they all settle in to sleep. Five minutes later there is another knock on the door. It is the pig and the cow.



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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

1961… What a Year!

Many Significant Events
What a Year! I graduated from the University of Tennessee, Beverly graduated from Hawesville High School (Kentucky), and we got married on June 8, 1961. (1961 was the first "upside-up" year, that is, a year in which the numerals that form the year look the same as when the numerals are rotated upside down, since 1881, and the last until 6009.)

Our Florida Honeymoon
A few days ago a high school girl friend of Beverly’s mailed us a copy of a letter Beverly had written to her some days after we had returned to Knoxville from our honeymoon in Florida. Included in the letter was the original post card Beverly had sent her in 1961 showing the place we stayed on our honeymoon. Here’s pictures of the King’s Bay Lodge post card from Crystal River, Florida. (Please click on the pictures for a larger view.)

cardfrnt.jpgAnd here’s the back of the post card.
 Cardbk.jpg If you enlarge the pictures you will notice it says to use a 4 cent stamp. And in Beverly’s hand written note she says it’s really nice, air conditioning, etc. Yes, in those days it was really nice. The week we spent  at King’s Bay Lodge was a wedding gift from Alex A. Shafer who owned the lodge and a prominent insurance agency in Knoxville, Tennessee. Shafer Insurance Agency is still operating a successful business today.

It is interesting that King’s Bay Lodge is still operating in 2009 in Crystal River, Florida. When we looked at the pictures on King’s Bay web site, Beverly and I looked at each other and almost in unison said, “When are we going back?”. We’re going to put that on our list of things to do within the next year!
 

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Think about the following and how true it is:
"What you do for yourself, dies with you; what you do for others will live forever."

~~~
Quote of the Day
Health is a state of complete physical,
mental and social well-being,
and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.
~World Health Organization

~~~
Joke of the Day

Four little boys had been arrested. The policeman had caught them in Mr. Blodgett's cherry tree.

The judge was a kindly man and he gave the boys a spiel on the evils of stealing and then asked 'em who their fathers were and what they were going to do to keep out of trouble in the future.

"My father is a doctor," the first boy said, "and I'm going to remember that eating stolen cherries can make me sick."

The second boy said, "My father is a banker and I'm going to remember that stealing cherries is as bad as stealing money."

"My father is a preacher," said the third boy, "and I am going to pray for strength to resist temptation."

"My father is a lawyer," said the fourth little boy, "and I'm going to sue Mr. Blodgett because I tore my pants on his tree!"



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Monday, September 21, 2009

The Woman’s Place

Cute Story
Not long ago someone sent me a cute story about women in Afghanistan.

WOMEN WHO KNOW THEIR PLACE

woman Barbara Walters, of 20/20, did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands. She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. Despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to, and are happy to, maintain the old custom.

Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, 'Why do you now seem happy with an old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?'

The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, 'Land Mines.'

Moral of the story is (no matter what language you speak or where you go):  BEHIND EVERY MAN, THERE'S A SMART WOMAN

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
As human beings we have a bad habit of putting question marks where God puts periods.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Keep thy tongue from evil,
and thy lips from speaking guile.
~Psalms 34:13

~~~
Joke of the Day

A defense attorney was cross examining a coroner.

The attorney asked, "Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man's pulse?"

The coroner said, "No."

The attorney then asked, "Did you listen for a heart beat?"

"No."

"Did you check for breathing?"

"No."

"So when you signed the death certificate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?"

The coroner, now tired of the brow beating said, "Well, let me put it this way. The man's brain was sitting in a jar on my desk, but for all I know he could be out there practicing law somewhere."



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Saturday, September 19, 2009

Dogs in Action

What a Dog Trainer!
Just watch this video and let me know if you have ever seen better trained dogs. I thought this was great! It’s a clip from a European dog show.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend. I am feeling great!

Coming Up
Next week I have an appointment with my family doctor on Tuesday. Then later in the week we’ll be heading to Knoxville for our annual church convention. I hope to collect some gems or fragments to share with you like I did last year. I’ve heard some call their convention notes crumbs, but I’ve decided I don’t like doing that myself. Crumbs are usually swept up and thrown away. In the Bible it was the fragments that were collected after Jesus fed the multitude. I’m sure those fragments were more than crumbs, and were used to feed others.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Remember the best way to improve you looks is with a nice smile… and it’s a lot cheaper than a make over.

~~~
Quote of the Day
The manner of giving is worth more than the gift.
~Pierre Corneille

~~~
Joke of the Day

A Lawyer and the Pope died at the same time, and both went to heaven.

They were met at the Pearly Gate by St. Peter who conducted them to their rooms. The Pope's room was basic with bare floor, army cot for a bed, and a single bulb for light.

They came to the Lawyer's room. It was huge with wall to wall carpeting, king sized water bed, indirect lighting, color TV, stereo, Jacuzzi and fully stocked bar.

The Lawyer said, "There must be a mistake. This must be the Pope's room!"

St Peter said, "There's no mistake. This is your room. We have lots of Pope's, but you're our very first Lawyer!"



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Friday, September 18, 2009

Are You Cracked?

Story of the Cracked Pot
A water bearer in India had two large pots, each hung on an end of a pole which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master's house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his master's house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made.

cracked_pot But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of it's own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do. After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you." "Why?" asked the bearer. "What are you ashamed of?" "I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master's house. Because of my flaws you have to do all of this work, and you don't get full value from your efforts." the pot said.

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, "As we return to the master's house I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path."

Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot noticed the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half it's load, and so again the pot apologized to the bearer for it's failure.

The bearer said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, and not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without you being just the way you are he would not have this beauty to grace his house."

Each of us has our own unique flaws. We are all cracked pots. Nothing goes to waste. Don't be afraid of your flaws. Acknowledge them, and you too can be the cause of beauty. Know that in our weakness we find our strength.

Went to Wal*Mart 
Yesterday, I went to Wal*Mart to do a little walking. I thought once to get one of those electric carts, but I don’t think my rear end came out far enough on each side to use one. So I just walked instead. It was good to get out and get a little exercise after being cooped up the past few days. I was really glad to get out of the hospital with an arm band rather than a toe tag.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
We all get stressed out at times.
I’m going to try to not let little things bother me.
Life is too short to get stressed out.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Illegal aliens have always been a problem
in the United States.  Ask any Indian. 
~Robert Orben

~~~
Joke of the Day

A very fat man was on the elevator one day when it stopped at a floor and a very thin man go on The fat man said, “Man you’re so skinny! You look like you've been in a famine”.

The thin man turned tom the fat man and said, “You look like you've caused one”.



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Thursday, September 17, 2009

My Hospital Visit

Spent 1 Night
I got home after one night in the hospital yesterday around Noon. They did the heart cath and found a 100% blockage. It was in my first stent that was inserted in 2002. It was clogged so bad they could not open it up. But the doctor said to smile and not worry, that everything was fine. He said I was still getting 80% blood flow to that part of my heart via new arteries that had grown voluntary to provide good blood flow. The stent that got clogged was one of the older stents that was not drug treated. The other 2 stents that I have are drug treated and are doing great with no clogging.

He’s also put me on a new medication to help blood flow called Isosorb Mono. The Doc said I would be back to full speed within a couple of weeks.

This event was just a checkup based on the stress test results. I did not have a heart attack, so I am very encouraged by what I was told yesterday before I left the hospital.

You may wonder about my blood test and probably think I have very high cholesterol. My total cholesterol runs around 141 with a LDL of 85 and a HDL of 40. That’s not real high, I think.

I was a little tired yesterday, but today has started off good and I feel great. I can’t go back to my normal work outs at the gym for a couple of weeks. And it also means no fishing for a few weeks. Now that is discouraging.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Hope is a wonderful comfort.
Make sure your hope is securely anchored. No one wants to be left holding the end of a useless rope.

~~~
Quote of the Day
God gives every bird its food,
but He does not throw it into its nest. 
~J.G. Holland

~~~
Joke of the Day

A man was about to go on trial for murder and he didn't feel that his chances for acquittal were very good, so he decided to get to one of the jurors. After sizing them up, he decided to bribe one little guy who didn't look any too bright. And he was successful. This little dope would take a bribe. The dope said to the man, "What do you want me to do?"

The man said, "I want you to oppose the death penalty."

The dope said, "How do I do that?"

"You just hold out for a verdict of manslaughter."

"Okay."

After the trial, the jury was charged and they retired. They were out deliberating for about four days. Meanwhile the man was on tenterhooks. Finally, they returned with a verdict. And the verdict was manslaughter.

The man was delighted with the verdict and as soon as he could he met the dope to pay him off. He said, "I'm tremendously obliged to you. Did you have a hard time holding out for a verdict of manslaughter?"

"Yeah. The other eleven guys wanted to acquit you!"



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Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Tennessee Granddaddy’s Ticker

A Heart Cath is Scheduled
Yesterday -The results from the stress test I took last Tuesday did not compare favorably with the stress test from March of this year. My cardiologist thinks I could have a new blockage or one of the existing stents may be clogged.

Today - He scheduled me for a heart cath today. I am to be at the hospital at 9:30 AM. And as you know I have no idea what time they with do the procedure. If they insert a new stent, I will have to stay over night, otherwise I will come home tonight.

Tomorrow - If I don’t have a post on Wednesday morning, you will know they kept me over night. I’ll try to post again on Thursday for sure.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
When you pray to God, give God the situation,
not what you think is the solution.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.
~Albert Camus

~~~
Joke of the Day

Cute story…

Scene: A courtroom in Oklahoma where a person is on trial for murder. There is strong evidence indicating guilt; however, there is no corpse. In the defense closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client is guilty and that it looks like he'll probably be convicted, resorts to a clever trick. "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise for you all," the lawyer says as he looks at his watch. "Within 1 minute, the person presumed dead in this case will walk into this court room," he says and he looks toward the courtroom door. The jury, somewhat stunned, all look on eagerly. A minute passes. Nothing happens.

Finally the lawyer says: "Actually, I made up the previous statement. But you all looked on with anticipation. I, therefore, put it to you that there is reasonable doubt in this case as to whether anyone was killed and insist that you return a verdict of not guilty."

The jury, clearly confused, retires to deliberate. A few minutes later, the jury returns and a representative pronounces a verdict of guilty.

"But how?" inquires the lawyer. "You must have had some doubt; I saw all of you stare at the door.”

Answers the jury foreman: "Oh, we did look. But your client didn't!”



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Monday, September 14, 2009

The Trial of the Big Bad Wolf

The Play
We enjoyed the play very much. Kara did an excellent job with her role as Jill, as in “Jack and Jill”.

That’s Jill (Kara) on the right with her pail, and Jack is on the left (see his broken crown). The Bailiff is in the center. BTkw1

Here’s a picture of the entire cast, Kara is on the front row, second from the right (If you wish, click on the picture for a larger view):

TBBW1200

Here’s a link to some pictures on Facebook showing more about the play and the characters. The Link

If you’re interested in learning more about the play you can read about it here: The Trial

Heart Health
Well, I had my stress test last week, and today I see the heart doctor to learn the results. I’ll let you know tomorrow what I learn.

 

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Growing old is better than I thought it would be.
(I still feel young in my mind, but not in my body.)

~~~
Quote of the Day
The whole purpose of education is to turn
mirrors into windows.
~Sydney J. Harris

~~~
Joke of the Day

A little boy and his father were standing in line at the grocery store behind a really large woman. She was dressed like an executive and was wearing a beeper.

The little boy was bored and could not stop looking at the woman. Finally, he said to his father, "Dad, look at the size of her rear!"

The father was appalled and said, "Shh! Son, Its not nice to talk that way about other people!"

So, after being quiet for a while longer, the little boy said, "Dad, take a look at the size of her legs!" and again the dad says, "Shh! son , you're embarrassing me!"

It wasn't long after that when her beeper went off, and the boy shouted, "Look out Dad, she's backing up!"



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Saturday, September 12, 2009

Zachary & Kara

Grandparents Day
Zachary’s school had grandparents day yesterday. Beverly and I enjoyed our visit to the school, having lunch with Zachary in the school cafeteria, going to his room, and meeting his teacher.

Here’s a picture of Beverly and I with Zachary taken yesterday in the school cafeteria.

P1060308                Picture by Hal K.

Kara and the Big Bad Wolf
acting Today we go see a play. Kara has a part in it. It’s called “The Trial of the Big Bad Wolf”. She plays the part of Jill as in “Jack and Jill”. The play has a cast of characters ranging from 8 to 73 years of age. An while it is geared toward children, we are told that audiences of all ages can enjoy and appreciate. We are looking forward to this performance and seeing Kara in the play. It’s taking place at Theatre Bristol.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Ever think about eternity? Just wonder if a little bird took one grain of sand from Daytona Beach, and flew all the way to California, then many months later the little bird would return to get another grain of sand… and this was continued until all of the sand was removed from Daytona Beach… then eternity would just of begun.
May we be singing praises with joy in eternity.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing, it was here first.
— Mark Twain

~~~
Joke of the Day

More and more doctors are running their practices like an assembly line. One fellow walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had.

He said, "Shingles." So she took down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat.

Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked him what he had. He said, "Shingles." So she took down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told him to wait in an examining room.

A half-hour later a nurse came in and asked him what he had. He said, "Shingles." So she gave him a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, told him to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor.

An hour later the doctor came in and asked him what he had. He said, "Shingles." The doctor said, "Where?" He said, "Outside in the truck. Where do you want them?"



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Friday, September 11, 2009

Water Bloopers

Video Makes You Say Ouch!
Here’s a funny video I ran across recently with some clips of bloopers around the water. I took particular note of this since we had just returned from the cabin and had been involved in some water sports. I watched the video to make sure I wasn’t in it. I wasn’t. Whew!  Enjoy!


happy_birthday_flower-1561Happy Birthday, Jade!

Today is Jade’s birthday and we wish we could be with her on her special day! Jade is in Utah and that’s a long way from us here in Tennessee. Papa and Nana wish Jade a very happy birthday!
 

Fishing Report
Ralph and I had a fun, bouncy, and interesting day on the water yesterday. We went to Watauga Lake and the wind nearly blew us off the lake… all day long. We did catch fish. We brought home 4 nice trout, and had released 3 others to give them the opportunity to grow larger. Here’s a picture of what the lake looked like when it was calm. The lake was usually wall to wall with white caps.P1060288

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
It’s so easy to be judgmental to all those we come in contact with, both to friends and strangers. It would be better if we just lived a true example. I remember hearing that the only judgment we should apply here on this earth is judge ourselves. For others we should apply mercy and love.

~~~
Quote of the Day

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
— Erica Jong


~~~
Joke of the Day

This is one of my favorite all time jokes!

It seems there was an old pirate living in the Black Flag Pirate Retirement Community who was being inter-viewed by the new, young house doctor.

The old pirate was your typical pirate, peg leg, hook for a hand and a patch over one eye. The young doctor was trying to get his medical history. "Well," says the pirate, “We was bombarding this Spanish fort when this cannonball hits me ship and blasts off me leg."

"And the hand?" asks the doctor.

The pirate says, "I tell you sonny, we had boarded this fine ship and there was fighting going on all around.
This mate I was battling was pretty good and he made a lucky swipe with his sword and took me hand clean off."

"OK," said the doctor; "How about your eye?"

"Well," said the pirate; "I was standing on the deck one day when a seagull flew down and pooped in me eye."

"Wait a minute," said the young doctor. "Do you expect me to believe that you lost your eye because some bird pooped in it?"

“Well," said the old pirate; "It was the first day I got me new hook!"



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Thursday, September 10, 2009

Funny Pictures

Some Funny Pictures
Recently i was sent a couple of funny pictures. I thought I would share with you.

This guy is just wishing someone would invent something to keep the sun out of his eyes. BillCap
This dog was top graduate in dog obedience school. ObedientDog

Fishing Today
We’re planning to go back to Watauga Lake today and try again for some of those big lake trout. We’ll be very fortunate if we do as good as we did last week.

 
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I remember hearing that opportunity may knock once, but temptation keeping banging
on the door every minute.

~~~
Quote of the Day
If you would keep your secret from an enemy,
tell it not to a friend.
— Ben Franklin

~~~
Joke of the Day

A man who had been bitten by a vicious dog rushed to the doctor to determine if he had rabies.

When the report came in a few days later the doctor said, "Jim, sorry but you do have rabies , a very serious case."

Jim sat down at a table in the office and began writing down a list of names. "Are those the people you want to remember in your will?" asked the doctor.

"NO", not exactly," said Jim." This is a list of people I want to bite before I die"



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