Monday, February 13, 2012

Car Museum

One That Celebrates America’s Love Affair
This car museum is supposed to be the largest in the world, and it contains only American cars. The cars themselves shows the history of the automobile in America, and the love Americans have for cars. It’s located in Tacoma, Washington. Too far away for me to visit anytime soon.

I have to admit that I like cars. There are some of the cars I have owned in the past that I would like to have now… why did I ever get rid of them? Hindsight is good but not very useful.

  • 1934 Ford Pickup Truck
  • 1950 2-door Sedan Ford
  • 1950 Ford Pickup Truck F150
  • 1957 Chevy Bel Air Convertible
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Do you know what today is. Well it’s the 13th of the month, and it could be your unlucky day if you don’t do something to prepare for tomorrow. Tomorrow is February 14—Valentine’s Day

~~~
Quote of the Day
Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.
~Mother Teresa

~~~
Joke of the Day

A married couple, both avid golfers, was discussing the future one night. "Honey", the wife said, "if I were to die and you were to remarry, would you two live in this house?"

"I suppose so - it's paid for."

"How about our car? Continued the woman. "Would the two of you keep that?

"I suppose so - it's paid for."

"What about my golf clubs? Would you let her use them too?

"Heck, no," the husband blurted out. "She is left-handed."



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Friday, February 10, 2012

Air Forces

Air Power Around the World
Here’s a very interesting video that was made in Israel about the air forces of the world. You might be surprised about what countries are in the top 10, and those that are not.

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
It’s Friday and I hope you are ready for the weekend!
Now don’t forget that Valentine’s Day is next week.
Be sure to have a little something for the one you love on Valentine’s Day.

~~~
Quote of the Day
Truth is not determined by majority vote.
~Doug Gwyn

~~~
Joke of the Day

Mr. Gable had a leak in the roof over his dining room, so he called a repairman to take a look at it. "When did you first notice the leak?" the repairman inquired.

Mr. Gable scowled. "Last night, when it took me two hours to finish my soup!"

~~~Your bonus joke for this Friday~~~

There was a man who always seemed to lean slightly to the left. His friend suggested he see a doctor and have his legs checked. For years he refused, saying his friend was crazy, but finally he gave in.

Sure enough, the doctor discovered that his left leg was shorter than his right. A quick bit of surgery made both legs the same length, and the man finally stood straight.

"So," the man's friend said, "You didn't believe me when I told you that you leaned."

The man replied, "Nope, but I stand corrected."



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Thursday, February 9, 2012

DEATH

How To Explain It
I received the following the other day and I thought it was a wonderful way to explain death. It’s good, I hope you enjoy…

A sick man turned to his doctor as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, 'Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side.'

Very quietly, the doctor said, 'I don't know.'

'You don't know? You're a Christian man, and don't know what's on the other side?'

open doorThe doctor was holding the handle of the door; On the other side came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room and leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said, 'Did you notice my dog? He's never been in this room before. He didn't know what was inside. He knew nothing except that his master was here, and when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.

I know little of what is on the other side of death, but I do know one thing... I know my Master is there and that is enough.'

 

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
When a friend dies, some of you dies.
When someone you love dies, more of you dies.
Be glad for memories that live.



~~~
Quote of the Day
You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money. 
~P.J. O'Rourke


~~~
Joke of the Day

Perks of reaching 60

01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

03. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

04. People call at 9 PM and ask, "did I wake you?"

05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

07. Things you buy now won't wear out.

08. You can eat supper at 4 PM.

09. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15 Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

Remember if you are over 60 to never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night



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Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Have A Good Mind?

Brain Study
My good friend Mark sent me the following the other day. I have seen something similar, but using all letters, where they are all out of order but the first and last letter. But the following was done with numbers.

They say if you can read this you have a strong mind. Give it a try!

7H15 M3554G3
53RV35 7O PR0V3
H0W 0UR M1ND5 C4N
D0 4M4Z1NG 7H1NG5!
1MPR3551V3 7H1NG5!
1N 7H3 B3G1NN1NG
17 WA5 H4RD BU7
N0W, 0N 7H15 LIN3
Y0UR M1ND 1S
R34D1NG 17
4U70M471C4LLY
W17H 0U7 3V3N
7H1NK1NG 4B0U7 17,
B3 PROUD! 0NLY
C3R741N P30PL3 C4N
R3AD 7H15.
PL3453 F0RW4RD 1F
U C4N R34D 7H15.

HOW 4BOU7 7H47! It took me a few seconds to get going, then I could read it just fine. I’m sure you did too. The human brain is amazing!

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Be Thankful, and Smile.

~~~
Quote of the Day
One half of knowing what you want is knowing what you must give up before you get it.
~Sidney Howard

~~~
Joke of the Day

They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS & TYPOS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

---------------------------------------------------------------
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
--------------------------
Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
--------------------------
Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
--------------------------
Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
--------------------------
For those of you who have children and
don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
--------------------------
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for
the choir. They need all the help they can get.
--------------------------
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
--------------------------
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
--------------------------
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
--------------------------
Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
--------------------------
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
--------------------------
Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
--------------------------
The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
--------------------------
This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
--------------------------
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
--------------------------
The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
--------------------------
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

 


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Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Becoming Illegal

Are There Benefits?
Well you’ll love this letter a man wrote to his Senator requesting to become classified as an illegal alien.

Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his
senator:

The Honorable Tom Harkin
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Phone (202) 224-3254

Washington DC, 20510

Dear Senator Harkin,
As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.

Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as 'in-state' tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums .. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.

If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.

Thank you for your assistance.

Your Loyal Constituent, (hoping to reach 'illegal alien' status rather than just a bona fide citizen of the USA )

Donald Ruppert
Burlington , IA

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
It’s a crazy world we live in.
The things that were done in Washington used to make a little sense. Today, nothing they do makes any sense.

~~~
Quote of the Day
I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive.  Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note - torn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one. 
~Henry Ward Beecher

~~~
Joke of the Day

An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas, leading a tired old mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat. He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed,
saying, "Hey old man, can you dance?"

The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No son, I  don't dance... never really wanted to"

A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well, you old fool, you're gonna dance now!" and started shooting at the old man's feet.

The old prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off,
started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet.
Everybody standing around was laughing. When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.

The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a
double-barreled 12 gauge shotgun and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air. The crowd stopped laughing immediately.
The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly.

The silence was deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin 12 gauge barrels. The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's
hands, as he quietly said; "Son, have you ever kissed a mule's rear end?"

The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir... but...
I've always wanted to."

There are a few lessons for all of us here:
* Don't be arrogant.
* Don't waste ammunition.
* Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
* Always make sure you know who is in control.
* And finally, Don't mess around with old folks; they didn't get old by being stupid...



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Monday, February 6, 2012

Predictions for 2012

Earlier This Year
I went out on a limb earlier this year and predicted that Obama would be re-elected as President of the U.S. A few days ago I received an email that supports my prediction. Read for yourself:

WHY OBAMA WILL BE RE-ELECTED IN 2012

Dr. Williams' prediction: Maybe you have read some newspaper articles written by Dr. Williams a conservative economist who happens to be Black. He has taught at several Universities and is currently teaching at George Mason University.

No Matter What By Dr. Walter Williams

Can President Obama be defeated in 2012? No. He can't.. I am going on record as saying that President Barak Obama will win a second term.

The media won't tell you this because a good election campaign means hundreds of millions (or in Obama's case billions) of dollars to them in advertising.

But the truth is, there simply are no conditions under which Barak Obama can be defeated in 2012.

The quality of the Republican candidate doesn't matter. Obama gets reelected.

Nine percent unemployment? No problem. Obama will win.

Gas prices moving toward five dollars a gallon? He still wins.

The economy soars or goes into the gutter. Obama wins.

War in the Middle East ? He wins a second term.

America's role as the leading Superpower disappears? Hurrah for Barak Obama!

The U.S. Government rushes toward bankruptcy, the dollar continues to sink on world markets and the price of daily goods and services soars due to inflation fueled by Obama's extraordinary deficit spending? Obama wins handily.

You are crazy Williams. Don't you understand how volatile politics can be when overall economic, government, and world conditions are declining? Sure I do. And that's why I know Obama will win.

The American people are notoriously ignorant of economics. And economics is the key to why Obama should be defeated.

Even when Obama's policies lead the nation to final ruin, the majority of the American people are going to believe the bait-and-switch tactics Obama and his supporters in the media will use to explain why it isn't his fault. After all, things were much worse than understood when he took office.

Obama's reelection is really a very, very simple math problem. Consider the following:

1) Blacks will vote for Obama blindly. Period. Doesn't matter what he does. It's a race thing. He's one of us,

2) College educated women will vote for Obama. Though they will be offended by this, they swoon at his oratory. It's really not more complex than that,

3) Liberals will vote for Obama. He is their great hope,

4) Democrats will vote for Obama. He is the leader of their party and his coat tails will carry them to victory nationwide,

5) Hispanics will vote for Obama. He is the path to citizenship for those who are illegal and Hispanic leaders recognize the political clout they carry in the Democratic Party,

6) Union members will vote overwhelmingly for Obama. He is their key to money and power in business, state and local politics,

7) Big Business will support Obama. They already have. He has almost $1 Billion dollars in his reelection purse gained largely from his connections with Big Business and is gaining more every day. Big Business loves Obama because he gives them access to taxpayer money so long as they support his social and political agenda,

8) The media love him. They may attack the people who work for him, but they love him. After all, to not love him would be racist,

9) Most other minorities and special interest groups will vote for him. Oddly, the overwhelming majority of Jews and Muslims will support him because they won't vote Republican. American Indians will support him. Obviously homosexuals tend to vote Democratic. And lastly,

10) Approximately half of independents will vote for Obama. And he doesn't need anywhere near that number because he has all of the groups previously mentioned. The President will win an overwhelming victory in 2012.

-- Dr. Walter Williams

IN ADDITION TO THE VOTING BLOCKS HE MENTIONS, THERE IS ANOTHER HUGE GROUP: THE NEARLY ONE-HALF OF ALL ADULTS DO NOT PAY ANY TAXES AND, IN FACT, MOST OF THEM RECEIVE MONEY FROM THE GOVERNMENT. THESE PEOPLE DO NOT WANT TO "SHAKE THE BOAT" TO DO ANYTHING TO STOP THE FLOW OF TAXPAYER MONEY TO THEMSELVES

It's believed the United States is now somewhere between the "complacency and apathy" phase of democracy, with some forty percent of the nation's population already having reached the "governmental dependency" phase.

If Congress grants amnesty and citizenship to twenty million criminal invaders called illegal's - and they vote - then we can say goodbye to the USA in fewer than five years.

~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I love the USA. I hope it survives.
I wish more young people knew what is at stake.
I have fears, but I trust in God.

~~~
Quote of the Day
You have freedom when you're easy in your harness. 
~Robert Frost

~~~
Joke of the Day

A lawyer and a senior citizen are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that seniors are so dumb that he could get one over on them easily. So, the lawyer asks if the senior would like to play a fun game.

The senior is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists, saying that the game is a lot of fun...."I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5.00. Then you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00," he says.

This catches the senior's attention and, to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.

The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the Moon?"

The senior doesn't say a word, but reaches into his pocket, pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.

Now, it's the senior's turn. He asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?"

The lawyer uses his laptop to search all references he can find on the Net. He sends E-mails to all the smart friends he knows; all to no avail. After an hour of searching, he finally gives up.

He wakes the senior and hands him $500.00. The senior pockets the $500.00 and goes right back to sleep.
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the senior up and asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"

The senior reaches into his pocket, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.



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Friday, February 3, 2012

The Star Spangled Banner

Can It Be Sung Correctly
It seems like a lot of famous singers cannot sing our National Anthem without messing it up is some way. But this video is proof, I think, that it can be sung correctly. Just listen to this version by Robert Merrill. He sings it with the respect it deserves.


Jim & Mary01My sister’s Birthday
is this weekend on Sunday. That’s February 5. I want to wish her a very happy birthday.

This picture shows Mary and me as youngsters. We are standing beside one of Dad’s trucks that was used to deliver poultry and eggs. Our Dad was the owner of White Bros. Poultry & Egg Co. that served the Knoxville area.

Mary and I had lots of fun together when we were growing up. We have lots of fond memories of the good old days.

Mary, Happy Birthday! 

happybirthday_animated
~~~
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
The weekend it upon us again.
I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

~~~
Quote of the Day
One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men.  No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.
~Elbert Hubbard

~~~
Joke of the Day

A man's wife was complaining to their friends about her husband who was spending all his free time in the bar.

So this one night he decided to invite her along to the bar with him. "What'll you have?" he asked. "Oh, I don't know. The same as you I suppose," she replied.

So the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel's and threw his down in one shot.

His wife watched in amazement, then took a sip from her glass. She immediately spat it out. "Yuck, that's TERRIBLE!" she spluttered. "How you can drink this stuff!"

"Well, there you go," said the husband. "And you think I'm out here enjoying myself every night!"



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