Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Something We All Need

An Exercise Block
We have an old butcher chopping block in the middle of our kitchen. So it’s easy for me to take a walk around the block. but for you that do not have a chopping block, here’s the answer for all of your exercise guilt.

TheBlockThe instructions read:

  1. Place the block on the floor in the center of room.
  2. Walk around the block twice, sit down and relax.
  3. If anyone asks, “Have you exercised today?”, tell them you walked around the block twice!
Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
As we quickly move into the Christmas Season,
let’s remember that love weighs more than gold.

Quote of the Day
Diseases of the soul are more dangerous and more numerous than those of the body. 

Joke of the Day

So there's this man with a parrot. And his parrot swears like a sailor, I mean he's a pistol. He can swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself. The trouble is that the guy who owns the parrot is a quiet, conservative type, and this bird's foul mouth is driving him crazy.

One day, it gets to be too much, so the guy grabs the bird by the throat, shakes him really hard, and yells, "QUIT IT!" But this just makes the bird mad and he swears more than ever.

Then the guy gets mad and says, "That's it. I'll get you." and locks the bird in a kitchen cabinet.
This really aggravates the bird and he claws and scratches, and when the guy finally lets him out, the bird cuts loose with a stream of invective that would make a veteran sailor blush.

At that point, the guy is so mad that he throws the bird into the freezer. For the first few seconds, there is a terrible din. The bird kicks and claws and thrashes. Then it suddenly goes very quiet.

At first the guy just waits, but then he starts to think that the bird may be hurt. After a couple of minutes of silence, he's so worried that he opens up the freezer door.

The bird calmly climbs onto the man's outstretched arm and says, "Awfully sorry about the trouble I gave you. I'll do my best to improve my vocabulary from now on."

The man is astounded. He can't understand the transformation that has come over the parrot.

Then the parrot says, "By the way, what did the chicken do?"

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1 comment:

John White said...

I love the parrot story, Jim. Great stuff as usual. Thanks for your comment on my blog from yesterday. Yes, the 4 bros were all in the service but Roy was the only one who was sent overseas.