Thursday, December 9, 2010

The Chicken That Crossed the Road

The answer that I always liked for the age old question: “Why did the chicken cross the road?” was to prove to the possum that it could be done safely.

pouleanimHowever, I recently received an email with other reasons depending on who you are.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

SARAH PALIN:  The chicken crossed the road because gosh-darn it, he's a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA:  The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN:  My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:  When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH:  We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY:  Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL:  Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON:  I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE:  I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY:  Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON:  Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL:  The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH:  Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

And I have more answers to this issue.
Maybe tomorrow?

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I’ve heard that the most important aspect to enjoying life is to be positive. And it sure make life more enjoyable to those around us.

Quote of the Day
Cell phones are the latest invention in rudeness.
~Terri Guillemets

Joke of the Day

One night a husband and his wife were sleeping and suddenly the wife woke up.

"Dear there’s a burglar eating the cake downstairs!” said the wife.

"So should I call the police or the ambulance?” Said the husband

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