Safety on the Internet

A Secure Browser
I recently learned about a free download from Dell Computer that gives you a browser that runs in a secure “sandbox” that separates the program and what happens when you browse the internet, from the rest of your computer. No malicious downloads can escape to infect your computer. I downloaded it earlier this week and it seems to work fine.

One thing I liked about it is that it’s a modified version of Firefox, and since I’m a current user of Firefox there was no learning curve for me. I’ve been using Firefox for several years, and I like it much better than Internet Explorer. It’s supposed to be safer also.

If you want to try this out for some additional security for your computer go to the Dell KACE web site.

Fishing Yesterday
We invited one of Doug’s friends to go fishing with us yesterday. His name is Gary. He’s a good fisherman and he concentrates on walleye fishing. It provided us a good opportunity to share fishing techniques. We did ask Gary to sign a “secrecy agreement”. Ha, just kidding!

We brought home our limit in Lake Trout and and a couple of nice rainbow trout. This picture shows me grinning and holding the stringer of eight trout. We came home early and I cleaned the fish before cleaning myself. Now I have some nice lake trout filets in the freezer.

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
You’ve heard most of these,
but it’s fun to review them every once in a while:

• His lights are on but nobody’s home.
• He's a few bricks shy of a full load.
• His bread is not quite done.
• His elevator does not go to the top floor.
• He has bats in his attic.
• His wood is not stacked straight.
• He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
• His motor will start, but will only idle.
• He's about 3/4 bubble off plumb. (Thanks to Mark)
• The wheel's turning but the hamster's dead. (Thanks to Mandy)
• He's not the brightest crayon in the box. (Thanks to Mandy)
• He's got a brain like a BB in a boxcar.
• His IQ is lower than a snake's belly in a wagon-rut.
• She's knitting with only one needle.
• He's A pane short of a window.
• He's got bats in the belfry.
• If they made hats the size of his brain he would be wearing a peanut shell.
• He's A few pickles short of a quart.
• He's Not the sharpest tool in the shed.
• He's a few cards short of a full deck.
• He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
• A few clowns short of a circus.
• A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
• Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
• He doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box.
• The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
• All foam, no beer.
• He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
• The elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
• His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.
• If brains were dynamite, he couldn't blow his nose.
• He doesn't have enough sandwiches for a picnic.
• He's not playing with a full deck.
• If you ever tax his brain, don't charge more than a penny.
• He doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box.
• They left the salt out of his cornbread.

~~~

Quote of the Day

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures
in the doctor's book.
~Irish Proverb

~~~
Joke of the Day

A new porter at a Paris hotel was instructed by the manager that it was important to call the guests by their names in order to make them feel welcome, and that the easiest way to find out their name was to look at their luggage.

Armed with this advice, the porter took two guests up to their rooms, put down their bags and said, "I hope you 'ave a very 'appy stay 'ere in Paris, Mr and Mrs Genuine Cow'ide."

(The above joke reminded me of one time I was going through the airport security with my briefcase. At that time I worked for Tennessee Eastman Company, and the company furnished briefcases to it’s traveling employees. Each briefcase was branded in gold letters “TEC”. Like I said, I was at the airport, and this security agent looked at my briefcase, and asked my name. He was just curious since he saw so many people having those same initials. I started to tell him it was Thomas Eugene Carter.)

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Fishing Today

Gators
This was on FOX News on Wednesday. I’m going fishing today up to South Holston Lake, and I don’t think we’ll run into a gator problem. But this guy sure did. If you haven’t see it, take a look.

(Sorry the video width is too large, but I can’t find a way to control it.)

I hope I have a few fish pictures to show you tomorrow. No alligator pictures, I promise.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
The other day I saw a one-liner, “Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.”

It reminded me of a story my sister told me about Dad. They were at the airport to meet some friends. While waiting they bought something from a vending machine. Mary got the change and started counting it. Then Dad said to Mary, “Don’t count your change!”
He explained, “If it’s not correct there’s nothing you can do about it, and you will worry about it. So it’s better just not to know.”

~~~

Quote of the Day

Envy is the art of counting the other fellow's blessings instead of your own. 
~Harold Coffin

~~~
Joke of the Day

Joe’s friend, Bill, was in the hospital for an ailment. While there, Bill just fell in love with the head nurse at the hospital.

Joe was telling me, “I guess you can say that he's taken a turn for the nurse!”

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Do Your Stretching

Remember Plastic Man?
When I was a kid I loved comic books. My favorites were Donald Duck, Superman, and Plastic Man. I think the first 2 are more well known than Plastic Man. But Plastic Man was pretty weird. Here’s a couple of old comic book covers I found on the internet.

Why and I talking about Plastic Man? Well, I saw a video the other day about Elastic Man, and it reminded me of Plastic Man. Here’s the video, but it might make you feel a little weird. (I wonder if this guy has every been x-rayed?)

 

Wishing I was Fishing
I may go fishing tomorrow. It looks like it’s going to be a good day as far as the weather goes. It will be HOT, but that Bimini top on the pontoon boat helps in keeping you cool.

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Don't ever marry for money...
You can borrow it cheaper.

~~~

Quote of the Day

When one bases his life on principle,
99 percent of his decisions are already made. 
~Author Unknown

~~~
Joke of the Day

Those three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are. The first one says: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can shoot an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".

The second one says: "Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".

The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says: "You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45!”

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Old Faithful

Not the Geyser
The “old faithful” I’m talking about today is the fishing lure that we’ve been using to catch those big lake trout. The picture to the right shows my fishing buddy, Doug, with that 9 lb. trout we caught last week. We caught it on “Old Faithful”.

I’m letting out the secret. “Old Faithful” is a homemade fishing lure. I buy the pieces and put them together. It consists on a hammered copper willow blade (size 5) with an extra hole drilled in it, a split ring, and a red treble hook (size 4). Here’s a picture of the finished product.

I’ve tried gold plated blades and brass blades, but nothing works as good as the copper. When it ages it gets dirty looking like an old penny, and it even seems to work better.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
It’s easy to be selfish… just caring for yourself.
Let’s try to put others before ourselves.

Someone said JOY comes from putting
Jesus 1st
Others 2nd
Yourself Last

~~~

Quote of the Day

Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton asked why.
~Bernard Baruch

~~~
Joke of the Day

A blonde goes into a coffee shop and notices there's a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So she peels it off and starts screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"

The waitress says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize is a free Lunch.?"

But the blonde keeps on screaming, "I've won a motor home! I've won a motor home!"

Finally, the manager comes over and says, "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're mistaken. You couldn't have possibly won a motor home because we didn't have that as a prize.

The blonde says, "No, it's not a mistake. I've won a motor home!"

And she hands the ticket to the manager and he reads...

"WINABAGEL:

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Teachers

What Do Teachers Make?
A good story. I doubt it is true, but shows the value of teachers. Read on…

The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life. One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?"

To stress his point he said to another guest; "You're a teacher, Barbara Be honest. What do you make?"

Barbara, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied, "You want to know what I make? (She paused for a second, then began...)

"Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could. I make a C+ feel like the Congressional Medal Of Honor winner.  I make kids sit through 40 minutes of class time when their parents can't make them sit for 5 minutes without an IPod, Game Cube or movie rental.

You want to know what I make? (She paused again and looked at each and every person at the table)

I make kids wonder.  I make them question. I make them apologize and mean it. I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions. I teach them to write and then I make them write. Keyboarding isn't everything.

I make them read, read, read. I make them show all their work in math. They use their God given brain, not the man-made calculator. I make my students from other countries learn everything they need to know about English while preserving their unique cultural identity. I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.

I make my students stand, placing their hand over their heart to say the Pledge Of Allegiance to the Flag, One Nation Under God, because we live in the United States of America.

Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they were given, work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life .

Barbara paused one last time and then continued.

Then, when people try to judge me by what I make, with me knowing money isn't everything, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention because they are ignorant.

You want to know what I make? I MAKE A DIFFERENCE. What do you make Mr. CEO?

His jaw dropped, he went silent.

A profound answer!!!

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
We know that knowledge is knowing facts;
and wisdom is knowing what to do
with the facts you know.

 

And someone told me once, that a wise man appears ridiculous in the company of fools. Better if we stay away from the foolish.

~~~

Quote of the Day

A teacher who is attempting to teach
without inspiring the pupil with a desire to learn
is hammering on cold iron.
~Horace Mann

~~~
Joke of the Day

A redneck was stopped by a game warden in Alabama recently with two ice chests full of fish. He was leavin' a cove well-known for its fishing.

The game warden asked the man, 'Do you have a license to catch those fish?'

'Naw, sir', replied the redneck. 'I ain't got none of them there licenses.. these here are my pet fish.'

'Pet fish?'

'Yeah.. Every night, I take these here fish down to the lake and let 'em swim 'round for awhile. Then, when I whistle, they jump right back into these here ice chests and I take 'em home.'

'That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that.'

The redneck looked at the warden for a moment and then said, 'It's the truth Mr. Government Man. I'll show ya. It really works.'

'O. K.', said the warden. 'I've got to see this!'

The redneck poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited.

After several minutes, the warden says, 'Well?'

'Well, what?', says the redneck.

The warden says, 'When are you going to call them back?'

'Call who back?'

'The FISH', replied the warden!

'What fish?' replied the redneck.

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Jails & Nursing Homes

Have you heard this idea?
Someone said let's put the seniors in jail, and the criminals in a nursing home. Well, it makes for a good joke…

This way the seniors would have access to showers, hobbies, and walks, they'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc. and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.

They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.

Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.

A guard would check on them every 20 minutes, and bring their meals and snacks to their cell. They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.

They would have access to a library, weight room,spiritual counseling, pool, and education, simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJs and legal aid would be free, on request.

Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard, with gardens.

Each senior could have a PC, TV, Radio, and daily phone calls.

There would be a board of directors, to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct, that would be strictly adhered to.

The "criminals" would get cold food, be left all alone, and unsupervised.. Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room, and pay $5000.00 per month and have no hope of ever getting out. Justice for all.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil -
it has no point.

~~~

Quote of the Day

Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea,
never regains its original dimensions.
~Oliver Wendell Holmes

~~~
Joke of the Day

Did You Know About The Goldberg Brothers -
The Inventors of the Automobile Air Conditioner.

Here's a little factoid for automotive buffs or just to dazzle your friends. The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max, invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner.

On July 17, 1946, the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees. The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's office and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry since the electric starter.

Henry was curious and invited them into his office. They refused and instead asked that he come out to the parking lot to their car. They persuaded him to get into the car, which was about 130 degrees, turned on the air conditioner, and cooled the car off immediately. The old man got very excited and invited them back to the office, where he offered them $3 million for the patent. The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but they wanted the recognition by having a label, 'The Goldberg Air Conditioner' on the dashboard of each car in which it was installed.

Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti-Semitic, and there was no way he was going to put the Goldberg's name on two million Fords. They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed on $4 million and that just their first names would be shown. And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show --

Lo, Norm, Hi, and Max on the controls.

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A Good Story with a Good Lesson

Dance in the Rain
The following was sent to me by a good friend a few days ago. You may have seen it before. It’s still good to read again. May we all know what true love really is…

The Rain It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of  his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'

He smiled as he patted my hand and said,

'She doesn't know me,
but I still know who she is.'

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought,

'That is the kind of love I want in my life.' True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.

'Life isn't about how to survive the storm, But how to dance in the rain.'

We are all getting Older. Tomorrow may be our turn. Enjoy life now - it has an expiration date!

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I like what Garfield said a few days ago, “Sometimes it seems like there isn’t enough time in the day to not do all the things that need not doing.”

~~~

Quote of the Day
If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden.
~Claudia Ghandi

~~~
Joke of the Day

Sign behind an Amish carriage:

"Energy efficient vehicle. Runs on grass and oats.

CAUTION: Avoid exhaust!"

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Trout Fishing

South Holston Lake 
Doug and I went fishing yesterday for some of those Lake Trout. It was really good to get back on the water. It had been over 3 weeks since I had been fishing, and I was needing a trip.

And we had a great day. The limit for Lake Trout is only 2 fish per person per day. We got to the lake around 8:00 am after a McDonald’s breakfast. We had our limit by 11:30 am. That was great fishing! And the size of the fish was good too. The largest weighed 9 pounds, and we had two that weighed 5 pounds, and the smallest was 3 lb 12 oz. See picture.

Wet Pictures
Here’s a few pictures from my pictures folder. All of them were taken in East Tennessee.

The picture below was taken while on Watauga Lake this year. I thought it was interesting.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Go Green!
Recycle Congress in 2010

~~~

Quote of the Day

Don't let the past steal your present.
~Terri Guillemets

~~~
Joke of the Day

A professional juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police.

"What are you doing with these matches and lighter fluid in your car?" asks the police officer.

"I'm a juggler and I juggle flaming torches in my act."

"Oh yeah? Let's see you do it," says the officer.

So the juggler gets out and starts juggling the blazing torches masterfully.

A couple driving by slows down to watch. "Wow," says the driver to his wife. "I'm glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they're giving now!"

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Will Rogers

A Man of Simple Wisdom and Humor
William Penn Adair "Will" Rogers (1879 – 1935) was a well known celebrity in the 1920s and 1930s. While he was before my time, I remember my Dad talking about him when I was young. He was known as a cowboy humorist who displayed the wisdom of the common honest man. His quotes still ring true today. Thanks to a friend (Thanks, BP) who sent me the following quotes from Will Rogers…

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
3. There are two theories to arguing with a woman . . Neither works.
4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
5. Always drink upstream from the herd.
6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.
8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
11. Letting' the cat outtalk the bag is a whole lot easier putting' it back.
12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

ABOUT GROWING OLDER...

First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me; I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way, and some of the roads weren't paved.

Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top

Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

Tenth ~ Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.

And, finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old. 
 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I’ve been wishing I was fishing these past few weeks. So I’m hoping to cure that situation today. My friend Doug and I are going to South Holston Lake today and try trolling for some of those lake trout. Remember, a bad day of fishing is better than a good day of yard work.

~~~

Quote of the Day
In winter I get up at night
And dress by yellow candle-light.
In summer quite the other way
I have to go to bed by day.
~Robert Louis Stevenson

~~~
Joke of the Day

Her five year old son squealed with delight when he opened his birthday present from his grandmother. It was a water pistol. He promptly ran to the sink to fill it.

"Mom," the mother said. "I'm surprised at you. Don't you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water pistols?"

Grandmother smiled and said, "Yes, I remember."

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The Highway rock

I’ve heard that there is  a huge rock near a gravel pit on Hwy 25 in  rural  Iowa. For  generations, kids have painted slogans, names,  and obscenities on this rock, changing its  character many times. A few months back, the  rock received its latest paint job, and since  then it has been left completely undisturbed.

It's quite an impressive sight. Be sure  to scroll down and check out the multiple  photos. all angles of the rock. I  thought the flag was draped over the rock, but  it's not. It's actually painted on the rock too.

	Here's the artist: Ray Sorensen.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I heard another story about carrying a load.

A little boy was carrying a wood box for his father, and a friend said "isn't that too heavy for you?” The little boy replied, “My daddy knows just how much I can carry."

Same with God, he’s never gives a load that is more than we can carry.

~~~

Quote of the Day

The family is a haven in a heartless world.
~Attributed to Christopher Lasch

~~~
Joke of the Day

What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons, Civil Engineers build targets.

~~~

Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.

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Getting Confused

Bathroom Mirror Prank
This is a good prank. It shows identical twins, one on each side of a clear glass. Each room is identical and it looks like one twin is being seen in a mirror. Then the fun starts when someone walks into the bathroom and they cannot see themselves in the mirror. It’s hilarious. If you haven’t seen it, take a look…

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I always liked the story about an older brother that was carrying his younger brother. Someone asked the older brother if the youngster wasn’t too heavy for him to carry. The boy replied, “He’s not too heavy, he’s my brother.”

Anytime we’re helping those we love,
the burden is easy to bear.

~~~

Quote of the Day
The difference between perseverance and obstinacy
is that one comes from a strong will,
and the other from a strong won't.
~Henry Ward Beecher

~~~
Joke of the Day

For those keyboard jockeys (those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day) who don't want to spend the money for those fancy exercise machines, here is a little secret for building arm and shoulder muscles. Three days a week is best.

Begin by standing (in your cubicle works well) with a five pound potato sack in each hand. Extend your arms straight out to your sides and hold them there as long as you can.

After a few weeks, move up to ten pound potato sacks and then fifty pound potato sacks, and finally get to where you can lift a one hundred pound potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute.

Next, start putting a few potatoes in the sacks.

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More Roses

Double Knockouts
We planted five more red rose bushes a few days ago. We had a small “problem area” between our sidewalk and the driveway that was in poor condition. We ripped up the ground cover that was planted there and started over with some rose bushes. I think they will be looking real good by next year. Here’s a picture.

Update - Easter Egg Plants
These plants are amazing. One on the plants has eight eggs and it is still blooming. Here’s a picture. Can you count the 8 eggs?

This picture shows one of the larger eggs. I think they will get even larger, then they will go through phases of color change. The eggs will be full of seeds if we want to plant some next year.

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Someone told me, “You can't expect a million dollar answer to a 5 cent prayer!”

~~~

Quote of the Day

Instead of complaining that the rosebush is full of thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses.
~Proverb

~~~
Joke of the Day

Differences Between Men and Women

Names
If Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara.

If John, Brad, Tony and Daniel go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bruno, Scrappy, Peanut-Head and Godzilla.

Eating Out
When the bill arrives, John, Brad, Tony and Daniel will each throw in $20, even though the total is only $34.25. None of them will have any smaller bills and none will admit they want change back.

When Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

Money
A man will pay $10 for a $5 item he needs.

A woman will pay $5 for a $10 item that she doesn't need, because it's on sale.

Bathrooms
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, razor, shaving cream, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Motel 6.

The average number of items in a woman's bathroom is 328. The average man would not be able to identify most of them.

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Net Books

A Neat, Small, and Very Portable Computer
Net books are a small computer which don’t include a CD/DVD drive. I’m sure they don’t compare to the
I Pad, but they appear to fill a need at fairly low cost. We got one last week that we ordered from Dell. It will be used mainly by Beverly, but we will both use it when we travel. It is lighter and smaller than my Dell notebook. We can both use it for email and I can write my blog from the net book when we are out of town.

The above picture shows the new net book on the left and my old notebook on the right. I think it will be very convenient for traveling. Also, we can sit in the family room and send emails back and forth to each other. ;-)

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
I think God worries more about our silence
than our cry for help.

~~~

Quote of the Day

I've never seen a smiling face that was not beautiful.
~Author Unknown

~~~
Joke of the Day

While two families were waiting in line to see the Washington Monument, their two five-year-old boys were getting acquainted.

"My name is Joshua. What's yours?" asked the first boy.

"Adam," replied the second.

"My daddy is a doctor. What does your daddy do for a living?" asked Joshua.

Adam proudly replied, "My daddy is a lawyer."

"Honest?" asked Joshua.

"No, just the regular kind," replied Adam.

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Did You Know

Video on the Progression of Information Technology
I am told this was researched and developed by Karl Fisch, Scott McLeod, and Jeff Brenman. You will find the rate at which everything is changing very interesting… or should I say amazing.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Failure is not an individual, it is a happening. 
There will always be failures in the future,
but remember its not you it's the happening.

~~~

Quote of the Day

Humor has a way of bringing people together.  It unites people.  In fact, I'm rather serious when I suggest that someone should plant a few whoopee cushions in the United Nations. 
~Ron Dentinger

~~~
Joke of the Day

One night a Preacher asked his audience if anyone there felt he had reached perfection.

One man stood.

"Do you mean to tell me you think you have reached perfection?"

"NO" said the man, "I'm standing in proxy for my wife's first husband."

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The Greatest, the Most, the Worst, etc.

Important to Review
The following is a good list to be familiar with. I saw it a few years ago and happened to rediscover it recently. I thought you might be interested in seeing it also:

• The most destructive habit------------------ Worry
• The greatest Joy--------------------------- Giving
• The greatest loss------------------------- Loss of self-respect
• The most satisfying work------------------- Helping others
• The ugliest personality trait--------------------- Selfishness
• The most endangered species------------- Dedicated leaders
• Our greatest natural resource---------------- Our youth
• The greatest "shot in the arm”-------------- Encouragement
• The greatest problem to overcome---------------- Fear
• The most effective sleeping pill----------------- Peace of mind
• The most crippling failure disease---------------- Excuses
• The most powerful force in life--------------------- Love
• The most dangerous pariah----------------------- A gossiper
• The world's most incredible computer----------- The brain
• The worst thing to be without--------------------- Hope
• The deadliest weapon-------------------------- The tongue
• The two most power-filled words------------------ “I Can"
• The greatest asset------------------------------------ Faith
• The most worthless emotion--------------------- Self-pity
• The most beautiful attire--------------------- SMILE!
• The most prized possession--------------------- Integrity
• The most powerful channel of communication---- Prayer
• The most contagious spirit--------------------- Enthusiasm
• The most important thing in life--------------------- GOD

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
This sounds silly, but it is so true:
”Myself can destroy me”.

~~~

Quote of the Day
May you always have work for your hands to do.
May your pockets hold always a coin or two.
May the sun shine bright on your windowpane.
May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
May the hand of a friend always be near you.
And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.
~Irish Blessing

~~~
Joke of the Day

Earl and Bubba two guys from Elbert County, Georgia are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, chewing and drinking beer when suddenly Bubba says, "I think I'm going to divorce my wife - she hasn't spoke to me in over 2 months."

Earl spits, sips his beer and says, "You better think it over - women like that are hard to find."

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Good Thoughts

For You and For Me 
Someone sent me the following good advice. It would be to our benefit to apply it in our lives.

Many people will walk in and out of your life. But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

To handle yourself, use your head;
To handle others, use your heart.

Anger is only one letter short of danger.

If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.

Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small minds discuss people.

He, who loses money, loses much;
He, who loses a friend, loses much more;
He, who loses faith, loses all.

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
My advice today is to make the best of any situation and don't ever wallow in defeat. Get up and start over.

~~~

Quote of the Day

A habit is something you can do without thinking - which is why most of us have so many of them.
~Frank A. Clark

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Joke of the Day

An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning until night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot.

One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife began harassing him again. Complain, nag, nag. It just went on and on.

All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet, caught her smack in the back of the head. It killed her dead on the spot.

At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd when a woman mourner would approach the old farmer. He would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement, but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it.

So, after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.

The old farmer said, "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement."

"And what about the men"? The minister asked.

"They wanted to know if the mule was for sale."

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The Storm was Mighty

A Time and Place for Prayer
Here’s an interesting story that I received from a friend, and it has a good lesson:

A brother worker (one of our preachers) from Scotland who labored in the outer islands, the Shetlands, Orkneys, and the Hybrides, was on his way back to Scotland at the end of the Mission year.

On the boat were several film stars, VIPs. These VIPs were treated with favor. One night they were to sup with the captain, a God-fearing man, who first gave thanks. Several of them by their expressions, mocked him. After the meal and the entertainment they all went to their rooms for the night.

During the night a fierce storm arose, so severe they even tied themselves with ropes to their bunks. Later in the night the VIPs sent a note to the captain: "Will we reach harbor or not?"

The captain replied with a note: " Maybe, maybe not."

Again they sent the Captain a note "Will you come down and pray in the storm?"

The Captain replied, "I pray in the calm, and look after my boat in the storm."

(Do we usually wait for the storm to pray?)

Today is July 13
Be careful today. Friday the 13th came on Tuesday this month. Watch out for black cats, ladders, and don’t break any mirrors.

 

~~~

Tennessee Granddaddy Says:
Someone said that the only difference between a rut and a grave is the length and depth!
So it would be good to stay out of a rut.
Get on the solid rock.

~~~

Quote of the Day

The road to success is dotted with
many tempting parking places.
~Author Unknown

~~~
Joke of the Day

A man went on a ski trip and was knocked unconscious by the chair lift. He called his insurance company from the hospital, but it refused to cover his injury.

"Why is the injury not covered"? He asked.

"You got hit in the head by a chair lift," the insurance rep said. "That makes you an idiot and we consider that a pre-existing condition."

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