Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Halloween & More

Happy Halloween
Be careful today and tonight.

One little ghost story. My Mother told this many years ago. I think it was true. A young girl was dared to go into the cemetery in the dark of night on Halloween and when she arrived at a certain grave to jab a sharp knife into the soil of the grave. The girl did this... but did not return home that night. When they went to the cemetery they found her. She was dead at that grave. They found the knife was securely placed into the sod on that grave. She had done the dare. But between the knife and the sod was her skirt! When she had bent down to jab the knife, she had accidentally jabbed the knife through her skirt. When she arose to leave after jabbing the knife into the grave, she felt something pulling her back toward the grave. Oh! She thought someone had grabbed her, and then she died of fright!
.... don't taken any dares tonight! Hahahahaha.....

PowerPoint Slide Shows
I have received several interesting and entertaining slide shows in the Microsoft PowerPoint Viewer format. To make it easy to share these with others I have placed them on a new web page named My Favorite Slide Shows. And if you do not have PowerPoint installed on your computer, I have provided a link on this page where you can download the FREE PowerPoint Viewer direct from Microsoft.

On these slide shows you will find some beautiful photography of earth, nature and animals. I think you would enjoy the slide shows. These 2 pictures in my blog today were taken from two of the slide shows. Relax... and enjoy!

I will update this page with new "stuff" when I find something interesting.

Is Your Bread Done?
Yesterday we ended up with about 19 saying about "strange people". Then Lisa sent me a link to a web site that has many, many more. If you are interested or if you are not playing with a full deck, you can check them out here: Fulldeck-isms:Witty Put Downs.

~~~
Quote of the Day
If you enjoy your job, you never have to go to work.
~ Author Unknown


~~~
Joke of the Day
A traveller wandering on an island inhabited entirely by cannibals comes upon a butcher shop. This shop specialised in human brains differentiated according to source. The sign in the shop read:
  • Artists' Brains $9/oz
  • Philosophers' Brains $12/oz
  • Scientists' Brains $15/oz
  • Republicans' Brains $19/oz
  • Democrats' Brains $2,000/oz
Upon reading the sign, the traveller noted, "My, why do those Democrats' brains cost so much? Are they popular?" To which the cannibal butcher replied, "Are you kidding! Do you have any idea how many Democrats you have to kill to get a ounce of brains?!"

(Note: If you are a democrat you can reverse cost of the
Republican and Democrat brains when telling this joke.
Actually, I think the cost for any politician's brains is $2,000 per oz.)


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Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Is Your Bread Done?

Over the years I heard comments about people that are kind of funny. Now, I don't mean any harm you know, but you have met people like this yourself. They are a little bit off maybe. Some of those saying that I have been trying to remember go like this:
  • His lights are on but no body's home.
  • He's a few bricks shy of a full load.
  • His bread is not quite done.
  • His elevator does not go to the top.
  • He has bats in his attic.
  • His wood is not stacked straight.
  • He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
  • His motor will start, but will only idle.
  • He's about 3/4 bubble off plumb. (Thanks to Mark)
  • The wheel's turning but the hamster's dead. (Thanks to Mandy)
  • He's not the brightest crayon in the box. (Thanks to Mandy)
I just got these next 8 from Lisa (10/30/07 5:00 pm). Thanks Lisa!
  • He's got a brain like a BB in a boxcar.
  • His IQ is lower than a snake's belly in a wagon-rut.
  • She's knitting with only one needle.
  • He's a pane short of a window.
  • He's got bats in the belfry.
  • If they made hats the size of his brain he would be wearing a peanut shell.
  • He's a few pickles short of a quart.
  • He's not the sharpest tool in the shed.
One person that might fit this description is this fellow. He just looks like he might not be the sharpest knife in the drawer. And, as for myself, I'm not really sure my elevator goes to the top. How about you?

Help Me, Please
I would like your help. If you can think of any of these types of saying that are not included in my list, I would like for you to send me an email or include them in a comment to this blog. My email is jrw5255@gmail.com.
New additions to the list are shown in red. We're getting a good list!
Thanks Mark and Mandy!
Thanks Lisa!
Anybody got some more of these saying?

~~~
Quote of the Day
“Things only have the value that we give them”
~ Moliere

~~~

Joke of the Day
A man was working in his garden near a mental hospital when one of the patients asked what he was doing.

The man answered, "I'm putting manure on my strawberries."

"That's funny", said the patient, "We put sugar and cream on ours and they think we are crazy.

~ Virginia Naylor Smith

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Monday, October 29, 2007

My Girls

This is a test of a new type of slide show. It shows the girls in Granddaddy's life.



I don't think I like it. It seems a little gaudy and too commercial looking.What do you think?

Interesting "Stuff"

Stuff
Just what is "stuff"? When we were in Mexico, one of my Mexican friends who was learning English discovered the word "stuff". He told me that he thought it was the most useful word in the English vocabulary. I ashed him why he liked the word. He told me it was such a useful word. It could mean anything! This picture shows some "stuff" that I keep in my tackle box.

Now I have some more stuff you might want to look at. My friend Bill Smither sent me these links recently.

Bathroom Mirror Prank
This prank is absolutely hilarious. Replace the mirror in a bathroom with a window pane, place a set of identical twins in identical rooms opposite each other and proceed to prank everyone who walks in. They've all become a vampires!

How Do You Hide an Airplane Factory?
These were some interesting photos from the WW II years' "Arsenal of Democracy". Shows an amazing World War II secret.


Latest Shuttle Photos from NASA
Here's some of the latest shuttle photographs from NASA. These are breathtaking photographs with excellent clarity.

Auto Nostalgia
A drive down automobile memory lane.

One more thing to show you... and that's a new diet pill really blocks fat. I think it is exactly what I need.

I think that's enough stuff for today. I hope you enjoyed a few of them. Have a wonderful week. And as my Dad says, SMILE!

~~~

Quote of the Day
A lie can travel halfway around the world
while the truth is putting on its shoes.
~ Mark Twain


~~~
Joke of the Day
Karl was telling his buddies back on the farm about his first visit to a big city church. "When I got there, they made me park my old pick-up in the corral," he began.
"You mean in the parking lot," interrupted Jeb, a more worldly fellow.

"Then I walked up the trail to the door," Karl continued.
"The sidewalk to the door," Jeb corrected.

"Inside the door, I was met by some dude," Karl went on.
"That would be the usher," explained Jeb.

"Well, the usher led me down the chute," said Karl.
"You mean the aisle," Jeb said.

"Then, he led me to a stall and told me to sit there," continued Karl.
"Pew," retorted Jeb.

"Yeah," Karl recalled. "That's exactly what the pretty lady said when I sat down beside her."

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Saturday, October 27, 2007

California On Fire

This is a picture of the fires in California taken from a boat in the San Diego Harbor. It was sent to me yesterday by my high school friend, Bill Smither, who now lives in California. Bill lives in Palm Desert, California. He is always sending his classmates something interesting via email.

The the picture of the fires burning make an interesting picture, we must not forget the terrible losses that people have suffered. I am sure it must be traumatic to loose your home and its contents. Just think of the pictures, keepsakes, gifts, etc. that are truly irreplaceable. While insurance may cover for a lot of the loses, there are things that are gone and that money could never replace.


Reflecting on this tragedy, it would be a reminder to each of us that we will lose all our earthly possessions some day. There will come a day when all that will matter is what treasure we have laid up in Heaven. At one of our church conventions this year, someone mentioned that the only thing we have that will go with us into eternity is our own soul. We sing in one of our Hymns, "Nothing matters but salvation." Truer words have never been uttered.

~~~
Quote of the Day
"Nearly all men can stand adversity,
but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."
~ Abraham Lincoln


~~~
Joke of the Day
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After the checkup, the doctor took the wife aside and told her, "If you don't do the following, your husband will lose his will to live and surely die."
  • Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast and send him off to work in a good mood.
  • At lunch time, make him a warm, nutritious meal and put him in a good frame of mind before he goes back to work.
  • For dinner, fix especially nice meals selected from his favorite foods and don't burden him with household chores or problems.
  • Be especially kind to him, and tell him you love him often. Let him do whatever he wants, and never argue with him.
On the way home, the husband asked his wife what the doctor had told her. She replied, "You're going to die."

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Friday, October 26, 2007

The Bridge

We went across that bridge at Dandridge, Tennessee yesterday morning.






This movie will give a little idea of what it is like. When you look at it, remember I had an 8.5 feet wide boat behind me. And when my left trailer tire is on the left yellow line the right trailer tire was on the white line. You'll get the idea. Once we passed a dump truck on the bridge. So it can be done, but you move very slow. I mean very slow.

What about the fishing, Jim? Well, I'm just plain embarrassed about it. We only caught a couple of blue gill and one bass. No crappie! And crappie was our target fish. I can't explain it. The weather was beautiful and the water temperature was a little cooler. The other boats we checked with were not doing any better. But next time it will be better. Oh, the optimism of the fisherman. He can get skunked badly, but he's ready to go back and try again with such optimism. That's me!

~~~
Quote of the Day
Wherever you go, no matter what the weather,
always bring your own sunshine
~ Author Unknown



~~~
Joke of the Day
A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor.

The doctor asked her
what had happened to her ears and she answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."

"Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But, what happened to your other ear?"

"The jerk called back!"

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Thursday, October 25, 2007

Have a Nice Day!

Yesterday, my Dad sent me an interesting document about the War on Terror. I think it had been sent to him from our mutual friend from Memphis (George M.). You can read it on my website here: Bush's Mistake on the War on Terror. I hope you read it and look at my other links about the war and the support of our troops: CLOSED - GONE FISHING I'll be closed for the rest of the day. Ralph Jones and I plan to slip down to Douglas Lake and see if there's enough water to fish. I'm hoping this rain cooled the lake and we can catch a few of them slabs (crappie). We'll put the boat in at Dandridge, TN and drive across that narrow bridge with the pontoon boat. (I'll try to get a picture of that bridge so you can see how it looks from inside the vehicle.) I'll let you know tomorrow if we do any catching. And I hope it's not catching a cold.

I hope you have a wonderful day while I'm working away, sweating under the toil of labor to put a little food on the table. Ha!


~~~
Quote of the Day
Some things have to be believed to be seen.
~ Author Unknown

Thanks to Beverly for the quote of the day.
She found it and passed it along to me.
It's profound!


~~~

Joke of the Day
A young employee was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?"

"Certainly," said the young employee. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.

"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."

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Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Palenque

Our years in Mexico would not have been complete without visits to some of the archaeological sites. One of the most impressive site we visited was the Mayan ruins at Palenque in the state of Chiapas, Mexico. The photograph shown here is of the Temple of Inscriptions. It was a very impressive structure.

On our visit there, Beverly, Bethany, Leo and I climbed to the top. There were also steps that descended into the depths of the structure. I made the trip to the very bottom down a steep and narrow stone stairway, which continued for 80 feet below the floor of the temple. We learned later that the presence of these steps were uncovered in 1948. An amazing discovery was made that changed the world's understanding of the Maya pyramids. It was at the bottom and center of the pyramid that the remains of a royal person was found along with a variety of jade and other artifacts. Interesting in the fact that this is in some ways similar to the pyramids in Egypt.

The Palenque site is much more elaborate that this one pyramid that I photographed. We also learned that much had the site had not even been uncovered yet. A guide pointed to a hill not too far away and told us that there was another pyramid there. The Mexican resources are limited to do justice to all that still lines overgrown and hidden from human eyes. If you are interested you can click on the following links to see more pictures of this site and to learn more about the Mayan culture:

It is apparent that great cities of Mayas existed at their peak. Now they are no more. Historians believe they fell victim to their own success. Is this another warning for us today?

~~~
Quote of the Day

"Where there is no vision, the people perish."

(Proverbs 29:18)


~~~
Joke of the Day
A zookeeper wanted to get some extra animals for his zoo, so he decided to compose a letter. The only problem was that he didn't know the plural of 'Mongoose'.

He started the letter: "To whom it may concern, I need two Mongeese."

No, that won't work, he thought and tried again: "To whom it may concern, I need two Mongooses." Is that right?

Finally, he got an idea: "To whom it may concern, I need a Mongoose, and while you're at it, send me another one."

~ Compliments from the King of Corn

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Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Just recently I received an award. I've been kind of modest about it. It came from one of my old high school friends. His name is Walter Sharp. In leading up to this award, he sent me a picture of some corn. It was in relation to one of my jokes. Then a few days later, after some more of my jokes on this blog, he crowned me King of Corn. And then following a few more jokes of the day, Walter told me that the Cornhedrin has called a special urgent emergency catastrophic assemblage & granted me permanent status as King of Corn! Walter, thanks for the honor of this prestigious award!

Optical Illusions

I came across some more optical illusions the other day, and thought I would share a few of them with you.This first Diagram always amazes me. You would think the lines slope, but all the horizontal lines are parallel.















The next two diagrams are interesting. On the one above I think you see a frog, but do you see the horse? On the right, I see a saxophone player and a girl. Do you?





~~~
Quote of the Day

"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."

~ Albert Einstein
~~~
Joke of the Day
Last summer, the President and Mrs. Clinton were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas.

On a venture one day, they stopped at a service station to fill up the car with gas. It seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary's high school love. Bill was quite amused at this, but didn't mention anything at the time.

They exchanged hellos and went on their way.

As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around Hillary and said, "Well, honey, if you had stayed with him, you would be the wife of a service station owner today."

She smirked and replied, "No, if I had stayed with him, he would have been President of the United States."

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Monday, October 22, 2007

More About Jade

We were all amused last week at the Zits cartoon from October 19, 2007 (Click to see it). As it showed a student with the large backpack who has Jade's same Vietnamese name. Jade's taking AP Calculus and Honors Geometry along with some other subjects. Her backpack is heavy, but not nearly as big as the one in the cartoon. Jade's doing great in school, with all A's on her first 6-week report. She is also participating on the high school swimming team. She loves swimming and the exercise is really good for her.

This past weekend Jade had the opportunity to participate (for the first time ever) in some interesting fall activities. We were invited to join some friends for a softball game on Saturday afternoon. Jade played softball for the very first time. Later we went to Kirk and Amanda's home for a hot dog cook out, popcorn balls, pumpkin carving, candy apples, marshmallow roasting around a bonfire. She brought me two steaming toasted marshmallow on a stick and I ate them gladly. Jade had helped make popcorn balls at Doug and Sue's the night before. We had a wonderful time. Thanks Kirk and Amanda!

I carved one pumpkin-- it was pretty simple. Jade did the next one, and did the complete job by herself, including all the cutting and cleaning our the insides. She put a "J" on the side of the pumpkin. See the first picture. The second one shows Jade finishing up on a candy apple.

Thanks to Lisa for both of the pictures today. Lisa has her own blog. You can check it out here: Every Day Is A New Day

~~~
Quotes of the Day

“You can not inspect quality into the product;

it is already there.”

~ W. Edwards Deming

“We should work on our process,

not the outcome of our processes.”

~ W. Edwards Deming

~~~
Joke of the Day
A lawyer and two friends--a Rabbi, and a Hindu holy man--had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.

The farmer said, "There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep in the house. So one of you must sleep in the barn."

"No problem," chimed the Rabbi. "My people wandered in the desert for forty years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for one evening." With that he departed to the barn, and the others bedded down for the night.

Moments later a knock was heard at the door; the farmer opened the door. There stood the Rabbi from the barn. "What's wrong?" asked the farmer. He replied, "I am grateful to you, but I just can't sleep in the barn. There is a pig in the barn, and my faith believes that is an unclean animal." His Hindu friend agrees to swap places with him. But a few minutes later the same scene reoccurs. There is a knock on the door. "What's wrong?" the farmer asks. The Hindu holy man replies, "I, too, am grateful for your helping us out, but there is a cow in the barn. In my country cows are considered sacred and I can't sleep on holy ground!"

That left only the lawyer to make the change. He grumbled and complained, but went out to the barn. Moments later there was another knock on the farmer's door. Frustrated and tired, the farmer opens the door, and there stood the pig and the cow.

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Saturday, October 20, 2007

Got the Big Head?

I don't have the big head, but I got to see the big head down in Mexico.

This picture shows Beverly and I along with our daughter, Bethany, and our friend, Leo. We are standing beside a
Colossal Head at the La Venta Park in Villahermosa, Mexico. These giant heads are one of the things left from the Olmec civilization.

The Olmec people are recognized as the predecessors of the Maya and Aztec civilizations in Mexico. They are mysterious in the fact that no one knows what happened to them. One thing they left for us to see are the Colossal Olmec Heads. When in Mexico we saw two of these heads. One was in Villahermosa at the La Venta Park, and the other was in a remote area of Mexico that we visited once with some friends. Only 17 of these heads have been uncovered to date. I believe the head in my picture is the same as this head. Here's another picture of this same head. To learn more about the Olmec civilization and the gigantic and mysterious heads click on the following links:
~~~
Jade's Grades
Jade brought home here 6-week report from school yesterday. She had earned straight A's! Congratulations, Jade! Your hard work and studying is paying off.

~~~

Quote of the Day
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain and most fools do.
~ Benjamin Franklin

~~~
Joke of the Day
This man had been in a second hand store where they kept lovely things and he noticed a grandfather clock. He really wanted the clock but never did buy it. One day he walked by and noticed they were having a sale and everything was half price. He goes in and yes the grandfather clock was half price. He said,"I'll take that grandfather clock and you can deliver it to this address. "Oh, NO" said the manager "we don't deliver half price items, but we know you. You've been in here and you live only three blocks. The clock is only 8 feet and you are 6 feet, so we will strap it on your back and you can carry it home. And like a fool the man agreed to this. So he is out leaning over carrying this 8 foot grandfather's clock and in his preoccupation he knocks a drunk to the sidewalk. And says to him "Why don't you look where you are going?" And the drunk looked up at the man and asked," Why don't you wear a wrist watch like everybody else in town?"

~~~

Caution Men Working Sign


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Friday, October 19, 2007

Wheels, Catemaco, and Gems

Today I was reminded of something that happened back during the 1970s energy crisis. Three of us guys carpooled to work. Bob, who had a strong southern accent, was in the front seat beside Hubert who was driving. I sat quietly in the back seat. Bob said, “Hubert, where’s a good place to by some 'ties'. Hubert began to explain to Bob that he did not need any ties. He reminded Bob that ties were not part of the dress code at work due to higher temperatures in the offices. Then Bob replied, “Hubert, I’m talking about automobile 'ties'!”

I choked and gagged and tried to keep from laughing, and I couldn't wait to tell someone who would laugh with me.
What made me think of that? Well, I bought some new Michelin® "ties" yesterday.
~~~
My picture today come from Catemaco, Veracruz, Mexico. The colorful boats were on the lake at Catemaco. The lake was formed by a volcano many years ago. They offer boat rides to go out on the lake to see lots of wildlife including an island inhabited by monkeys. On one part of the boat trip they stop at place where you can go for a walk in the jungle. On this walk you pass an area where the movie, "Medicine Man" was made. It starred Sean Connery. You also pass by little huts where you could actually visit with a Shaman and have your fortune told or something, It was eerie and we didn't like the vibes we got when we were close to their little huts. They even have an annual gathering of witches at Catemaco. You can also get a special mud placed on your face like a mud pack. It's supposed to bring back a youthful appearance. I tried it. It did not help me. You can read more about this mysterious little town at these links:
~~~
Convention Gems
I have completed my Convention Gems from Paris, Tennessee. You can download a pdf file of the gems from 3 conventions: Knoxville, Madisonville, and Paris. Click
Convention Gems.

~~~
Quote of the Day

A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice.
~ Ed Howe

~~~
Jokes of the Day?
George was worried that his wife Lucy, might be losing her hearing, as he'd recently noticed that often he didn't get a reply when he spoke to her from a distance. He wasn't sure how to bring up this rather sensitive subject with her, so he decided to ask the family doctor.

"Well," the doctor said, "knowing Lucy and you as I do, I'd suggest that tonight while she's in the kitchen, you stand about 15 feet away from her and ask her in a normal voice what's for supper. If she doesn't respond, move about 5 feet closer and ask again. If she still doesn't reply, move another 5 feet closer and ask again. Let me know what happens and we'll figure out what to do."

That evening while Lucy was at the kitchen sink washing vegetables and preparing the meal, George stood about 15 feet away, cleared his throat and asked, "What's for supper, Lucy?" He got no response, so he moved up about 5 feet. "What's for supper, Lucy?" he asked again, and still he didn't hear a peep. He moved up another 5 feet, almost right behind her, and asked, "What's for supper, Lucy?". Turning around to face him, Lucy said, "For Pete's sake George! I've told you twice already. We're having meat loaf and mashed potatoes!".


Do you like corn? Try this for corny...

A police officer spotted a car speeding and swerving slightly. He pulled behind it and activated his lights. But the driver didn’t respond. So the officer pulled alongside the car. He was astounded to see that the driver was knitting. The officer lowered his window and yelled, “Pull over!” “No,” the driver hollered back. “It's a Scarf.”

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Thursday, October 18, 2007

A Grand Canyon

Back in the early 1990s, Beverly went with me on a company trip for a conference in Scottsdale, Arizona. While there I took some extra vacation and we drove to visit the Grand Canyon.

If you have even been there, you know that it truly takes your breath away. It is one of the Seven Natural Wonders of the World. It is hard for the human mind to comprehend the vastness and the natural beauty of the canyon. While there I took a few pictures on a 35mm camera, which were scanned a few years ago. They do not do justice to the Grand Canyon, and you can do a Google search to find other photographs much better than mine.

~~~~~

All else going pretty good at the White house this morning. Today I have my monthly lunch meeting with old cronies from Eastman. We enjoy getting together and resolving all of the company's problems, complaining about health care costs, griping about our aches & pains, and so on. Beverly just told me she wants me to drop her off at the mall while I go to lunch with the guys. So, I'll make it a short lunch today to minimize costs (my lunch $ plus her shopping $).

~~~
Quote of the Day

There is a way which seemeth right unto a man,
but the end thereof are the ways of death.

~ Proverbs 14:12

~~~
Joke of the Day
The Pope took a couple of days off to visit the mountains for some sightseeing. He was cruising along the campground in the Popemobile when there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. A helpless Democrat, wearing sandals, shorts, a "Save the Whales"/"Bush Lied" T-shirt and a tree hugger hat, was screaming while struggling frantically, thrashing around trying to free himself from the jaws of a 10 foot grizzly.

As the Pope watched horrified, a group of Republican loggers came racing up. One quickly fired a .44 magnum into the bear's chest. The other two reached up and pulled the bleeding semiconscious Democrat from the bear's grasp. Then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck while the other tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back seat.

As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions!" he told them. "I heard there was a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic environmental activists but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is not true."

As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies "Who was that guy?"

"It was the Pope.", another replied, "He's in direct contact with God and has access to all God's wisdom." "Well,"the logger said, "he may have access to all God's wisdom but he sure doesn't know anything about bear hunting! By the way, is the bait holding up, or do we need to go back to town and snatch another one?"

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Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Good Morning!

We had a good day on Douglas Lake. We did a little catching and lots of fishing. We caught a mixed bag total of only 8 fish: 2 bluegill, 2 crappie, 2 catfish, 1sauger pike and 1 drum. Not what I would call a good day but we had fun and good boat ride. The water temperature was 74.5 degrees, still a little warm for good fall crappie fishing. We saw tons of fish on the depth finder but not many hits. We had hoped for lots of crappie like the one in the picture (It measured 12.5 inches).

We were amazed to see the lake so low. We had to put in at the public ramp at Dandridge (Going across that narrow bridge is really exciting!).This picture shows the ramp, and the low level of the lake.


On the way back home, we stopped by Swann's Marina. See the picture that shows the marina almost entirely on dry land, and where there is water it is only inches deep. The place is closed until spring or later.



~~~
Quote of the Day

"You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going,
because you might not get there."

~ Yogi Berra

~~~
Joke of the Day
A man and his wife are driving home and having an argument about his driving. Angry, the man looks at his wife and says "Why did God make you so beautiful but so dumb?" The wife thought for a minute then replied "Well, he made me beautiful so you would love me, and he made me dumb so I would love you!"

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Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Gone Fishing

I'm closed for the day. I decided it was time to go back to Douglas Lake and try those "croppie" and see if they are biting. I plan to open up in the morning, so come on back and we'll talk about the weather, the drought, the fishing , the catching, etc. Just be careful when you come in and don't slip on any of those fish scales on the steps.

My picture today shows a typical street scene in Mexico. This picture was taken in Minatitlan, Veracruz in 1956. It shows some Mexican families selling fruit under some colorful umbrellas. (Remember you can click on the picture for a larger view.)



~~~
Quote of the Day

Put cotton in your ears, pebbles in your shoes,
gloves on your hands and Vaseline on your glasses
and you have instant old age.
~ Virginia Naylor Smith


~~~
Joke of the Day
A man passed away and went to heaven. Arriving at the pearly gates, St. Peter said, "Come on in. I'll show you around. You'll like it here." Walking through the gates, the man noticed clocks everywhere. There were grandfather clocks, wall clock, watches, and clocks in every corner. It appeared that heaven was nothing more than a giant clock warehouse.

Surprised at how heaven looked, the man asked, "St. Peter, what's the deal? Why are all these clocks here in heaven?" St. Peter replied, "The clocks keep track of things on earth. There is one clock for each person. Every time the person on earth tells a lie, his clock moves one minute.""For instance, this clock is for Sam, the used car salesman. If you watch it closely, it will move." "Click." The minute hand on Sam's clock moved one minute. "Click." It moved another minute. "Sam must be into closing a customer right now," said St. Peter. "The minute hand on his clock moves all day."

The man and St. Peter continued walking. Soon, they came to a clock with cobwebs on the minute hand. "Whose clock is this?" asked the man. "That clock belongs to the widow Mary. She is one of the finest, God-fearing, people on earth. I bet her clock hasn't moved in a year or two."

They continued walking and touring heaven. The man enjoyed watching the clocks of all his friends. When the tour was finished, the man said, "I've seen everyone's clock but President Clinton's. Where is his clock?" Saint Peter smiled, "Just look up. We use his clock for a ceiling fan."

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Monday, October 15, 2007

Back Home

Good Afternoon!

This morning Dad and I drove on Interstate 40, from Lebanon to Knoxville.We had stopped in Lebanon last night after our church convention ended in Paris, TN. I left Dad in Knoxville around 10 AM and now Mr. Bear and I are back in Kingsport.

My pictures today show some of our relatives from West Tennessee. The first one shows my Dad with my Cousin Joyce. The second picture show Tommy Rieben, me, and Johnny Rieben, two of my cousins. Joyce, Tommy, and Johnny are brothers and sisters.
~~~
Quote of the Day

When you look at your life,
the greatest happinesses are family happinesses.

~Joyce Brothers




~~~
Joke of the Day
A guy is walking past a big wooden fence at the insane asylum and he hears all the residents inside chanting, "Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen!"

Quite curious about this, he finds a hole in the fence, and looks in. Someone inside pokes him in the eye.

Then everyone inside the asylum starts chanting,"Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!

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Saturday, October 13, 2007

Mr. Bear


As we head toward East Tennessee we will be bringing Mr. Bear back with us. This picture shows Mr. Bear with his creator, Tommy Rieben (my cousin). Mr. Bear will not be a problem. He assures us he will not need any breaks on our trip home. He has a woodsy smell about him, and his head is a little lumpy. He's seems to be a quiet fellow, so I don't think he will bother Dad and me on our trip back home.

Cousins in Paris

Good Saturday Morning!
Dad and I are still in Paris, Tennessee at our church convention. These are truly "good days". I will work on my convention gems when I get back home to Kingsport.

Yesterday I also got to see some of my cousins who are the children of John and Margie Rieben. Dad and I got a visit with Joyce, Johnny and Tommy. We got a picture or two but I have to wait for them to be emailed to me.

My cousin the Sculptor
I also learned that Tommy is a chain saw sculptor. He had a bear he had done in the back of his truck. I am thinking that that bear might go back to East Tennessee with Dad and me. I hope to get a picture of the bear later today.


Chainsaw sculptures may be on the cutting edge of art right now. Tommy started in this business four years ago. He said his first wooden figure was a large owl. He said the first owl took him a week and a half. He has at least 5 chainsaws of different sizes. Tommy says when he walks in the woods, he sees different things, like trolls, leprechauns, hillbillies, cowboys, bears etc.

~~~

Quote of the Day

Life is short, but there is always time enough for courtesy.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson


~~~
Joke of the Day
A State Policeman stopped a car full of nuns and asked the nun who was clutching the wheel if she knew how fast she was driving. She replied, "Yes, officer, I was going 20 mph." He asked her if she knew what the speed limit was on that road and she said, "It is 20 mph, I saw a sign a little way back that said so."

He said, "Sister, the speed limit is 65 mph., I stopped you because you were driving too slow. The sign that you saw a little way back was I-20 and that means this is Interstate 20." She apologized and explained that they didn't get out much and she didn't know that.

He looked in the back seat and saw three nuns, pale as ghost, sweating and clutching the seat in front of them. He asked, "What is wrong with them?" She replied, "I just got off of I-95."

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Friday, October 12, 2007

Friday in Paris

Good morning!
Dad told me to tell you hello this morning.

We're in Paris, Tennessee and we are doing fine. I really don't have time while I am here to do justice to writing up my Paris Convention Gems. I will write these up and post them after convention.

We a a wonderful day of meetings yesterday, and got to see a lot of old friends from the past. It sure brings back fond memories of days gone by.

~~~

Quote of the Day
The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do,
something to love, and something to hope for.

~ Allan K. Chalmers


~~~
Joke of the Day

A fellow from Ohio was down in Tennessee and decided to go squirrel hunting. He roamed the woods all day and never had a thing to show for it. As he was headed for his auto he saw this young boy with squirrels hanging all the way around his body under his belt. He asked the boy how he got all the squirrels. The boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and showed the man some small steel balls. He told the man he used some of these small steel balls. About that time a squirrel jumped from one tree to the next. The boy took a steel ball in his left hand and threw it and hit the squirrel right the head. The man marveled at this and and complimented the boy on being so accurate, left handed and all. The boy said oh I'm not left handed it's just my daddy says I tear them up to bad when I throw right handed.

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Thursday, October 11, 2007

In Paris

When I got to Dad's yesterday, the man was in the bucket cutting his tree. Here's a couple of pictures I took before we left. The last picture shows that he wasn't finished before we left. But we heard from Mary last evening that he completed the job, and the tree is now gone. Mary said he put the bird bath on the stump. (Click on the pictures for a larger view.)

Now we are at the hotel and ready for some breakfast. After that we will head to the convention grounds for what we know will be a good and profitable day.

~~~
Quote of the Day

In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance,
everyone should have a dog that will worship him
and a cat that will ignore him.

~ Dereke Bruce


~~~
Joke of the Day
Mary Margaret was preparing for the sisterhood, and was required to live for 3 years in the Motherhouse, before her final vows. The Motherhouse rules required total silence, except each nun was allowed to say only two words per year during their yearly evaluation with mother superior.

At the end of her first year, Mary Margaret was ushered into Mother Superior's office, and taking a seat, Mother Superior asked her what would be her two words for this year. Mary Margaret replied "food's cold". Mother Superior thanked Mary Margaret and told her to return to her room.

After her second year at the Motherhouse. Mary Margaret was again ushered into Mother Superior's office, and once again, was asked by Mother for her two word for this year. "Bed's hard" replied Mary Margaret. "Thank you Mary Margaret I shall make note of it" said Mother Superior.

Upon completing her third year, and before her final vows, Mary Margaret again visited the office of Mother Superior for her yearly two words. "And what are your two words for this year?" asked Mother Superior. "I quit" said Mary Margaret. "Well I'm not surprised" replied Mother Superior, "ever since you've been here, it's been nothing but complaining."

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Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Going West

My Dad and I have decided to go west (But only to West Tennessee, and only for a few days.) We're leaving today to go to our last church convention in Tennessee at Paris. This convention is held on a farm which is owned by my Uncle John, who is my Mother's brother.

I'll drive to Knoxville in the morning and as soon as Dad gets that tree cut down we'll take off west. Dad may have some some pictures later on his journal to show the tree being cut down. You can check it out here at
Dad's Tomato Garden Journal.

Beverly and Jade are going to stay home and hold down the fort. And I think Mary is going to have a visitor while we're gone to Paris.
~~~~~
My picture today shows a beautiful sunset in Mexico. While the picture looks like it was taken close to a large body of water, actually the water in the picture is a swimming pool. The pool and palm trees were in the compound where Beverly and I lived when we were in Mexico. The compound had numerous apartments where employees lived who worked at the TEMEX chemical plant. Eastman had an arrangement with them where some of us "gringos" could live while in Mexico.

We enjoyed our days in Mexico very much. See those palm trees, well, we've seen Mexico boy climb those trees, almost effortlessly, and throw down coconuts. And then use their machetes to cut them to get the coconut milk and the meat.
~~~~~
Click on the Train of Life. A good friend sent this to me yesterday. Thanks Don B! How do you ride the train?

~~~
Quote of the Day

“The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain"

~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

~~~
Joke of the Day
When the water got to the farmer's bottom windows, a neighbor rowed over to rescue him. The farmer declined,"I'm a man of faith. God will save me." When the waters rose to the second story windows another neighbor appeared in a motor boat. Again the farmer refused to be rescued. "I'm a man of faith. God will save me." Finally the man sat on top of the roof, a helicopter flew over and lowered a ladder. Once again the farmer declined. "I'm a man of faith I'm certain that God will save me."

The next thing he knew the farmer found himself at the pearly gates. "What happened?" he moaned to St Peter. Why didn't God save me?" St. Peter shook his head sadly saying, " Listen here, we sent a rowboat, a motorboat and a helicopter."

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Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Going to School the Hard Way

I just received this from a friend. This video clip shows a frightening way that some Columbian children take in order to go to school. It takes them for a one minute cable ride of terror 1200 feet above the jungle to reach the other side. The alternative is a two-and-a-half hour hike.

It's unbelievable! Click this line to watch it.
Make sure your sound is on to hear the details about this.

Some Rust Buckets

Greetings my friends! I hope this week is going good for you. We're having a beautiful fall, and it makes you thankful for the privilege of life.

My picture today was taken in Coatza- coalcos, Mexico. It shows an old, rusty trawler heading out into the Gulf of Mexico. The second picture shows some old rust buckets that are in line for salvage. I think maybe that trawler in the first picture will be joining the others real soon. (Click on the pictures for a larger view.)

These pictures were taken around 1997 when we lived in Mexico for two and a half years. I was working for Eastman Chemical Company at that time and Coatzacoalcos was the largest town that was close to where we lived. It was on the Gulf of Mexico, and while not a tourist town, there a few nice restaurants there as well as the only McDonald's in the area. There was one intersection in Coatzacoalcos they called "gringo corner" because there was a Pizza Hut, KFC and some other American fast food eateries there.

What is a Gringo? Check Wikipedia.


~~~
Quote of the Day

"I have been driven many times upon my knees
by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go.
My own wisdom and that of all about me
seemed insufficient for that day."

~ Abraham Lincoln


~~~
Joke of the Day
KIDS WILL BE KIDS - A little boy and his father were standing in line at the grocery store behind a really large woman. She was dressed like an executive and was wearing a beeper.

The little boy was bored and could not stop looking at the woman. Finally, he said to his father, "Dad, look at the size of her rear!" The father was appalled and said, "Shh! Son, Its not nice to talk that way about other people!"

So, after being quiet for a while longer, the little boy said "Dad, take a look at the size of her legs!" and again the dad says, "Shh! son , you're embarrassing me!"

It wasn't long after that when her beeper went off, and the boy shouted, "Look out Dad, she's backing up!"

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